Always and Forever
by caroline132
Summary: They are back in Storybrook after an adventure i Neverland that changed everything. Or did it? Hook thinks that Emma has chosen Neal and decides to leave, will Emma be able to stop him before it's to late?
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first fanfiction ever, and I'm not used to write in English either (Swedish), but I hope that you will like it anyway :)  
I want to give a special thanks to LegoHouse that has help me a lot with with the English, don't now what I would have done without her notes! **

**Enjoy! **

* * *

They had been welcomed by almost the whole town when the Jolly Roger reached the harbour in Storybooke. Even Regina had received hugs and been celebrated when they set foot on the docks. Right now they were at Granny's, surrounded by people. It had been only a couple of hours since Emma had been onboard the Roger, with the smell of the sea and the light breeze against her ivory skin. She could feel Hook's burning gaze from the table in front of her, but she refused to lift her head up and look at him. The journey back to Storybrook had been exhausting.

With Henry back, she didn't need to worry about him anymore. However, she still had this feeling that something wasn't right. With both Hook and Neal on the ship, and her parent's concerned looks, it didn't allowed her much space to run away. She had stayed in her cabin most of the time, trying her best to avoid them, and she had focused her energy on Henry instead.

She had ignored Neal's desperate attempts to talk to her, or make her listen to his opinions and thoughts about what she should do. She narrowed her eyebrows slightly and she blushes, thinking about their conversation last night.

"_Emma, can we talk?" Neil grasped her wrist and made her stop. She turned and looked at him. _

_Emma hadn't been able to sleep and she was on her way to the main deck, to get fresh air and feel the comfort of the wind. It usually calmed her down. The small space in the crew's cabins made her claustrophobic at night, and she never got a good night's rest. _

"_What?" she turned around to face him. It was after midnight, and she was tired. _

_The look on his face made her regret the harsh tone. She did love him. And no matter what he had done, he was Henry's father. She forced a smile on her lips, reassuring that everything was okay.  
Even if it wasn't. _

_"I thought that I would stay around in Storybrook when we get back," he started slowly and met her eyes. "I think it would be good for Henry to have a safe family environment when we come back, he has been through a lot," he smiled gently. _

_Emma didn't know what she should answer or what she felt about it, but she knew that Henry would be happy. And he was right, he needed to feel safe._

_"Yeah, I think that would be a good idea," she answered him._

_Neal's face lit up a bit and he continued, "I talked to Henry before, and I said that I maybe could stay with you two."_

_His confession made Emma raise her eyebrows and a confusing expression spread across her face._  
_"You talked to Henry before me?" her tone was clearly annoyed._

_"Well it sort of just came up," said Neal, shrugging his shoulders._

_Emma could feel how she slowly started to boil inside. He was using Henry against her. Her son wouldn't understand why Emma didn't want his father to stay with them, and then he would blame her. She would become the villain. Her breath suddenly felt heavy, and she knew that she would do anything to make Henry happy. She wanted to give him what she had never had, a family. _

"_I guess that I don't have much say in the matter then, if that's what Henry wants," she glared at him with both a flash of defeat and fury in her eyes.  
_

_He didn't catch it, so instead Neil smiled at her and Emma continued.  
"You can stay with Henry and me in Storybrooke if that is what you want; I know that he wants to spend time with you." _

_She hadn't __noticed __that __a __figure __had approached __from behind, and suddenly she could feel Hook's presence. The situation suddenly felt intolerable, as the tension in the air quickly changed. _

_Her muscles stiffened and tensed at once, her body shivered slightly. In the back of her mind she wondered how much he had heard. _

_Neil obviously thought that Hook showing up was like a birthday gift, judging on his grin.__  
"Good, I will start to ship my things from New York as soon as we get back," he added. _

_Emma felt like she just wanted to sink through the wooden floor, down in the endless sea and never get a breath of air again. She couldn't answer him, so she just nodded. If Hook hadn't heard them before he definitely did now. _

"_I am going to take some air," she mumbled weakly as she pushed past Neil and headed toward the stairs. _

They had arrived in Storybrooke the day after. If the relationship between Hook and Emma had been tense before, with a single "hello" or "goodnight", it was non-existent at this point. She wanted to explain, but there was nothing that she could say. She felt her confusion, her fears and her obligations slowly drowning her. The relief of being back had been short lived.

Neverland had changed a lot between them, if they hadn't found Neil she had no idea where she would be right now.

Emma shook her head slightly and looked down at the food in front of her, she had barely touched it. She feelt like she owed Hookan explanation, or something to erase the nagging feeling that ran through her body.

She heard David's authoritative voice at the table in front of her "Leaving so soon, Hook?"

To her astonishment Hook and her father had almost become _mates, _as Hook always called it. They had spent an awful lot of time sharing war stories, sword fight techniques and memories.

"Aye, need prepare the ship," Hook answers with a low, firm voice as he stood up.

"Why? We just came back, take some time off! You deserve it," said a cheerful David.

Hook stood silent for a moment and he turned his gaze at the people in front of him. Her long blond hair were dancing with soft curls that falls in front of her shoulders as she leant forward, and he could hear her light laughter as she looked at Henry. Neil was smiling, teasingly throwing a paper towel at Henry since he had succeeded in spilling out what was left of his cocoa.

That's when he decides, and he tried to answer David with his normal, joking voice, eyes looking empty. "I am leaving, there is nothing left for me here, after all, I am but a pirate"

David threw him a surprised look, but he wasn't blind, and he saw Hook looking at the table in front of them, at his daughter. He understood, and even though the pirate had grown on him, relief washed over him.

"When?" David replied briefly, "The ship must need some work after our journey, right?" The answer is short, ushered in a quiet tone, "It will be done tomorrow night I Believe."

"Well, let me know if you need anything, it's the least we could do to thank you"  
Hook nodded at him and then turned around to leave, without looking back.

Emma can't ignore the feeling when her heart suddenly feels like it turned to ice. _He was leaving._ Emptiness washed over her, sending chills down her spine, and it suddenly felt like she was back in foster system, not belonging. Neal saw that something was wrong.

"Are you alright Emma?" he asks softly. "I… I think that I might be getting a cold," she said, slightly stuttering.

"Oh, should we go back to our home?" Emma automatically made a distasteful face as she hears the word _our home _from his lips.

"No, I will be fine! Henry and you should stay," she reassured him with a small smile.  
"I probably just need a walk," she continued, as she got up and kissed Henry on his forehead before leaving through the door of Granny's diner.

The fresh air outside didn't help at all. She has a nauseating feeling in her stomach and her thoughts were a mess. She walked down the street, away from everybody. She didn't reflect over her surroundings. _Everybody leaft. He'd said that he would wait. He'd swore that she could trust him. And he had lied._

Suddenly she could distinguish the Jolly Roger's sails by the docks. She was standing so far away that she could barley smell the sea, and with concentration she could faintly hear the waves throwing themselves towards the harbour. A tear was falling down her cheek and she desperately tried to push the feelings away.

She tried to think of Henry, of his laugh, of the happy look on his face at Granny's, of how he is the most important thing in her life. How he deserved a happy ending. Emma swallowed and picked up the pace, heading back to her apartment.

She crawled into bed and pulled the covers over her head as soon as she was inside. When she'd heard Henry and Neal coming home she pretended that she was asleep. She just want to be left alone, if only for a minute.

Her body was totally drained, as if her energy had been stolen away. Every time she closed her eyes, she only could see stormy, crystal clear blue eyes_. The look on his face after she'd kissed him in Neverland, the way his voice sounded when he 'd reassured her that they would find Henry, the way he looked so at ease when he sailed the Jolly Roger on the way back home. _She hopelessly tried to push the thoughts away, and she eventually refused to close her eyes in defiance. Staring up at the sealing.


	2. Chapter 2

She awakened with a sudden jerk, as Henry and Neal were standing by her bedside.  
"Mom, we made you breakfast!" said her son, his voice sounding excited.

"How nice of you!" she couldn't help smiling to him. Neal put down the tray at her bedside.

It was Sunday, which meant she had the day off. Usually, she would be happy to stay in bed and watch movies with Henry. However, today she cursed under her breath. She would have done anything to be able to hide away, buried in paperwork and forced to focus on something else rather than the nagging feeling in her stomach.

"You didn't have to," she looked quickly at Neal, giving him a faint smile.

"We thought you deserved it after everything that has happened, are you feeling better today?" he asked.

"Yeah, I feel fine," she replied, totally aware that it is a complete and utter lie. And when Neal believed her, the same nagging feeling she'd been having ever since that dreadful conversation that Hook had overheard told her that the captain would have caught her lie.

The day passes by slowly, perhaps even more so because and she is constantly looking at her watch, counting the minutes, waiting for something. For what, she did not know. She'd tried to clean the apartment and stay busy. Everything not to think of _him. _It wouldn't work between them, he was a _pirate_. He was the feared and ruthless Captain Hook for God's sake. She needed to think of Henry right now._  
Still, she did wonder if he was going to say goodbye. _

Later that afternoon she headed for Granny's to meet Neal and Henry, who had spent their day outside. When she steps inside the diner she couldn't see them, so she sat down with Charming and Snow instead. Her parents, she mused, still not quite sure whether she actually believed it or not.

She ordered a hamburger and unwillingly started eating it, knowing that she needed too. She quickly put it down back on the plate when she feels the nauseating feeling in her stomach returning. "Maybe I really am sick,"Emma mumbled, sighting.

All of the sudden, the door to Granny's opened. Thinking that it was Henry coming back from his day with Neal, Emma lifted her head up, smiling brightly. Her face froze at once, when her emerald eyes met piercing blue ones.

She desperately tried to turn her gaze away, breaking the moment, but her body wouldn't listen. After a couple of seconds, David noticed that Emma practically looked like she'd seen a ghost. Her Eyes were wide open and there almost was an electrical tension surrounding her. David threw a worried look behind his shoulder, relaxing a little when he saw the person standing there, yet worrying because of his daughter's reaction.

"Hook!" David greeted him, "Come to tell your goodbyes?"

Hook didn't answer at once, still mesmerized by the blond girl with the green eyes. He hadn't expected to see her. Earlier that day he had seen Henry and Neal by the park, and assumed that Emma would be with them. He didn't stay around to find out.

Hook coughed to clear his throat, and succeeded to answer with his normal carless tone of voice. Years of practice made it possible. "Aye, indeed I am, I wanted…" his words interrupted by Henry, who ran into the diner throwing himself in his mother's lap.

"Guess who won a sword fight today?" he laughed happily, totally unaware of the tension that had thickened the air.

Emma quietly thanked God for the interruption; she honestly felt like her chest had been about to explode a just second ago.

"You, I would assume," Emma said, while she pinched her son's nose teasingly.  
Neal walked past Hook and up to Emma, making her move further into the seat so that he could sit down beside Henry and her.

"Hook, what are you doing here?" Neal asked, sounding suprised.

"I thought that you would have left by now" he then added, slightly annoyed.

"I'm leaving tomorrow early at dawn," answered a stiff Hook, close to snapping. An uncomfortably silence filled the air in the diner. Even Henry shifted in his seat restlessly.

"Well, I am not going to disturb your family dinner any longer, I better be going," Hook said, breaking the silence.  
His tone of voice made Emma quiver inside. It sounded sarcastic and strained to her ears. Emma avoided Hook's burning eyes on her.

"Emma, it has been a pleasure meeting you," his voice forcing her to look up. Her eyes mets his again. She didn't answer, unable to put what she wished to say into words.

Emma could see it, the pain behind his flirtatious grin and cold eyes. She briefly wondered what he saw in hers_. _The impulse to reach out to him, make it go away, was quickly repressed. She only nodded and forced a smile on her lips, knowing that it didn't quite reach her eyes.

Emma jerked when Snow put a hand on her daughter's wrist, trying to comfort her. Obviously aware of what was going on with her daughter's heart.

"I wish you luck then, I hope you find what you are looking for," David said and noddded at Hook.

"I very seriously doubt it" Hook replied, almost to himself. "Take care," he then added and was about to turn away but hesitated for a second. Before he left, he put a hand on Neal's shoulder, "Take care of them, mate," he said sincerely. Hook Heard a distinctive "I will," as his feet took him away.

Emma could feel the panic washing over her and she focused on her breathing. She thought of the ocean and about how the waves rocked her to sleep on the Jolly Roger. She hadn't noticed how her nails had dug into Henry's arm until he pulled away, "Mom you're hurting me!"

"Oh, I'm so sorry" Emma whispered weakly with tears in her eyes, hopelessly trying to push them away.

"Don't, worry I am alright" Henry replied when he looked up at his mother's face.

Snow threw her a concerned look, "Emma, are you feeling alright?"  
Emma smiled weakly, "Yeah, I think that… I need to use the restrooms".

She was immediately on her feet moving toward the ladies' room, using all the energy that she had left not to break apart in front of them. Emma didn't understand what was happening to her. She definitely should _not_ feel like this.

The door to the restroom shuts with a slam. That was when her knees gave up and she sunk down on the cold floor. Her body was shaking desperately and she was sobbing with her head resting against the wall. She didn't know how long she just sat there unable to move. Not wanting to move ever again.

She lifted her head up when she heard someone knocking on the door. "Mom, are you okay?" Henry's voice sounded anxious.

"Yeah, one minute kid," she forced her voice to sound as normal as she can master. When she opened the door he stood outside looking up at her.

"You don't look alright mom, and I don't think you have the flu" Emma met his concerned look and put a hand on his head, "Don't you worry about me, I just got something in my eye"  
She knew that he wouldn't believe it.

"You don't want him to leave, do you?" his tone laced with sadness. If her heart hadn't already been in a thousand pieces it now was.

Henry paused for a moment, "You should tell him you know! Everybody deserve a fairytale ending"

Emma couldn't help but to let out a laugh, "Sometimes, I wonder how old you really are."  
She bent down to place a kiss on his cheek and pulled him into a hug.  
"Thank you" she whispered in his ear before she let go and walked through the diner and out through the door.

She heard Neal calling after her but she ignored it and started running down the street. It was already dark outside and the cold air made her cheeks and fingers numb. When she got a glimpse of the Jolly Roger she stopped abruptly.

She has stopped crying and her breathing was heavy after the run. Emma continued forward with gentle steps. She had definitely _not _thought this through. She didn't know what to say, what to do or what she wanted. She only knew that she had to get rid of the painful feeling that made her body shudder in agony.

Emma stepped on board the Jolly Roger searching with her eyes after Hook. Her throat felt sore, and she didn't think that she had the strength to call his name. _He should know that someone is here,_ she thought in the back of her mind. Emma had never been able to sneak up on him, no matter how quiet she'd been.

"What are you doing onboard my ship, darling?" a voice startled her and she quickly turned around. He stood father away than usual, his tone sounding accusing, as if she'd just broke an unwritten law.

When she didn't answer him, he heightened one eyebrow with a questioning expression on his face. "Hook, I just wanted..." Emma started before he interrupted her.

"Thought that you would tease me some more, did you?" he cocked his head on the side, glancing at her. The words went straight through her heart, making her step back.

"You can't just leave," she said, her eyes searching for a connection with his piercing blue ones.

"And why not?" he replied quickly with a raised voice. Emma could feel him pushing her away, but she didn't dare say it. _Because I will miss you. Because I love you.  
_  
"I thought that you wanted to start over, I thought that you wanted to change. Are you just going to go back to being a pirate?" she answered, matching his tone of voice. Her throat didn't feel sore anymore, she felt a burst of anger burning inside.

"Well, that's what I am love," he replied. Normally his words would be filled with flirtation, but Emma only heared despise.

"You think that I want to stay around to watch your happily ever after with him? No thank you," he spit out, eyes turning dark. His words made her question why she came here in the first place. Suddenly she couldn't come up with a single reason.

"I guess I should have known better then, you're always just going to be that, incapable of anything else, but what do I care, you're just a pirate," her sharp words hang in the air.

The only sound that reached her ears was their loud breathing and the waves throwing themselves at the Jolly Roger. The cold air and the darkness swallowed her, and the hostility in the air made her feel sick. She stared at him, immediately regretting what she'd just said. She could see how his earlier anger disappeared when his eyes went blank; it felt like watching him _die_ right in front of her eyes.

Emma grasped for breath and her lips started trembling as Hook pushed himself past her and headed down to the cabins. She heard him hiss "Just leave," before he disappeared from her sight. Emma was paralyzed for a moment, and then the desperation hit her like an ice cold wave.

"You said that you would never give up!" she accused him. He slammed the door to the captain's cabin before she could reach it and she hears how the lock snap in place.

She leant down behind it, unable to move. "You said that I could trust you," her voice trembling. Tears were rolling down her cheeks. She just sat there for what feels like hours, but was more like seconds, refusing to go away, because she knew that it would be goodbye.

"_Killian please," _her plea coming as a whisper drenched in despaire.  
"M_ake it go away" _she begged quietly,_ n_ot knowing if he could hear her words.

Within seconds, the door opened behind her. Killian bent down and sat next to her and gently pulled her up in his lap with her head resting on his chest. Emma threw her arms around his neck, as if her life depended on it. She sobbed quietly and desperately leant in closer with her face buried in his leather jacket. He ran his hand through her hair without saying a word.

When Emma's breathing started to get back to normal he whispers, with tenderness in his voice, "Make what go away?" Emma took a moment before she answered him. "The pain. Make the pain go away," she pleaded once more, her vocie muffled by his neck.

She didn't have to explain, because he felt it too.


	3. Chapter 3

Emma didn't want to ever let go of the pirate she was hoplessly holding on to. The feeling of emptiness slowly disappeared as Killian lets his hand move across her back, sending warming tingles down her spine and making butterflies appear in her stomach. After a while she slightly lifted her head up from his chest.

She blushed a bit when she realized that his shirt has become a bit damp with her tears. The nauseating feeling was gone, but a flash of guilt flew through her, causing her to bite her lip and slightly narrow her brows. Emma cast her head done again, burying it in his jacket, like it would make every bad feeling go away.

"Emma?" Killian placed a light strand of hair behind her ear, trying to make her face him.

"I´m sorry," she whispered faintly.

"I know," he sighted. "It is okay," Killian reassured her.

"No it's not." Emma lifted her head up again and looked at him stubbornly.  
She couldn't see a trace of their earlier fight, but he has dark shadows under his eyes. Emma attempted to continue, to explain, but she couldn't find the words. Instead she looked at him pleadingly, hoping that he would understand.

"I want…" she started, only to hesitate. His scent made her dizzy and she could sense how his muscles tensed around her. When she didn't continue, he sighted and pulled her in deeper within his arms. He didn't push her to say anything and he stayed silent, giving her a moment.

Emma looked at him, and this time she didn't resist her impulse, and she reached out to places a hand on his cheek. Then, she slowly let it fall down, following his jaw line. Killian closed his eyes and let his head fall deeper into her hand unconsciously.

"_Please don't leave," _her words were barley a whisper and her heart was hammering inside her chest.

He opened his eyes, and looked deep down in her emerald ones.  
"I wouldn't dream of it, love" he promised, before his lips were finally pressed against hers.

Emma felt a burst of pure love flow through her. It was terrifying, and her first instinct was to run away, but the taste of saltwater, of rum and of the sweetest honey made her stay, soaking it all in. The kiss wasn't hungry or desperate like the one in Neverland. This kiss was a promise.

Her hands were tangled in his soft hair, and she pulled herself closer. She noticed how her legs had ended up on either side of him, and when she pulled back, she can look straight into his eyes. They sparkled like the ocean on a sunny day and were filled with the most genuine adoration.

He gave her a playful grin before he leaned forward, gently placing his lips over hers again. A light laugher escaped her lips, which he used as an excuse to deepen the kiss. Emma felt his tongue softly explore her moth, taking it's time. She quivered slightly as his hand slipped under her shirt to rest on her lower back.  
"Hook," she breathed as she pulled her head away, resting against his shoulder. The sound of his moniker made him flinch. Their shared moment made it feel harsh and wrong coming from her tender lips.

"I have a name you know," he declared softly. Emma raised her brows with a teasing smile on her lips.

"You do? I can't seem to remember," she replied. A daring expression with a devious grin appeared on his face. It made her heart race faster and her body suddenly shivered with a longing desire.

"Well," he started and licked his lower lip teasingly, "I guess that I will have to _make _you remember then," Killian continued with a low, intense voice, eyes burning with emotion.

Before Emma knew what was happening, she was pinned down on the floor. Her wrists were stuck over her head beneath his hook and his face is right above hers. She could smell the rum on his breath. He smiled challengingly at the blonde that was caught underneath him, and started to put light kisses on her collarbones.

Emma tried to get free and she squirmed impatiently on the floor as she moaned quietly. His weight made it impossible to get away and she tried not to let a laugh slip as he touched a ticklish spot right above her chest.

"Hook, stop it," she tried to sound serious and gave him a defiant look underneath her eyelashes.  
"Do you rememb…" his sentence was cut off when something hits him at the side, making him fly off of her and into the wall with a loud bang.

"You are going to regret ever touching her, pirate," David hissed with rage. Emma didn't have time to react before he kicked Killian's side, making him moan in pain. The sound makes her heart ache.

"David don't!" she screamed as her voice broke. Emma threw herself over Killian's body before her father could kick him again.

"Emma, what are you doing? Defending that creep!" David roared and gripped Emma's shoulder to pull her away.

"Don't you _dare_ touch him," she snarled with a fierce voice, staring at him with eyes that would make a lion cower. David's hands at his daughter's shoulder dropped like it had been burned. Emma turned around quickly as David stumbled back with a confusing look on his face, not knowing what to believe at all.

"Killian, are you okay? Killian?" she couldn't disguise the concern in her voice.

He smiled faintly, "So, you do remember my name," he whisperd Before losing consciousness as his world went dark.


	4. Chapter 4

Snow hurried through the hospital entrance with Neal right behind her. She had received a heartbreaking phone call from her daughter twenty minutes ago. She could still hear Emma's voice breaking on the phone, barely making out understandable sentences. They had left Henry with Ruby, despite his loud protests, so she was pretty sure that he would turn up soon.

She was hurrying towards David that was pacing back and forth in the hospital's waiting room, looking worried.

"David, what is going on? Where is Emma?" Snow asked her husband.

"Is she hurt?" Neal put in, looking around anxiously.

"I don't know," David answered them as he wiped away a drop of sweat on his forehead.  
"She didn't let me talk to her," he added with a hurt expression flashing across his face.

Snow gave him a surprised look, "Why? What did you do?"

"He was all over her, he must have… It looked like," David stuttered.

"He did what?" Neal burst out.

"Where is Hook?" Snow said with eyes wide open.

"I knocked him out, he's unconscious for now, I don't know how he is, she won't let me in," David said and shrugged, looking down at his feet.

"Charming!" Snow cried out and looked at her husband in disbelief.

"He had her pinned down to the floor for god's sake!" David snapped with a low, angry sounding voice, "What was I supposed to think!?"

"Where is she?" Neal said with concern in his voice, but his eyes revealed sparkles of fury as he looked around in the waiting room.

"She's in one of the rooms down the hall," David pointed thoughtlessly in the right direction.

Before Snow could stop him, Neal was on his way with firm steps.

Emma leaned back in the blue hospital chair that was placed next to Killian's bed. Her eyes were puffy from the crying and she felt overwhelmed and exhausted. Thinking back, she wasn't really sure what had happened. One minute she was screaming at her father, the next they were at the hospital, and she was told to stay in the waiting room. David had tried to calm her down but she'd refused to talk to him, feeling both anger and obstinacy rise in her chest. She sighted and slowly put her head down on the hospital bed, resting against it. She knew that she shouldn't blame David, he'd only looking out for her, but seeing Killian like this made all her rational thoughts disappear like smoke in the air. She slightly shook her head and bit down her lower lip to repress another tear falling down her cheek.

Emma felt the terrifying feeling return in her body. It wasn't only concern about him that gave her goosebumps and made her body tremble. It was fear of what they had, what it meant, and what he made her feel. Dr. Whale had said that he would be fine. Killian was still unconscious and she begged silently that she would get to look into his eyes just for a second. The fear was overwhelming and she couldn't handle it. Before she knew what she was doing she headed towards the door, smashing right into Neal.

"Emma, are you alright?" he exclaimed and pulled her into a hug. The embrace didn't feel comforting at all, and she pulled back. "Yeah, I'm fine. What are you doing here?" she asked confused.

"David said that Hook had attacked you!" Neal said with contempt and glanced over her shoulder and laid eyes on the person in the hospital bed. "What are you doing in his room, for God's sake Emma!" Neal's eyes narrowed.

"He didn't attack me!" Emma snapped sharply. She pushed herself past Neal and rushed out down the hall, not planning on talking more to him anymore.  
"Emma!" he shouted, running after her, "What happened?"  
"Let me help you Emma," Neal tried with a softer voice.

She didn't want to explain how she felt like her chest was going to explode, how he had shattered her heart in a million pieces and how she was scared to death to let someone pick up the remaining parts of her. She didn't want to explain how her feelings terrified her, and especially not to Neal.

It felt like the fear inside invaded her mind, like she couldn't get air in her lungs. Her head was spinning and Neal's attempts to talk just made everything worse.

"I don't want your help! I don't want you, or any of it!" she screamed at him before storming out of the building with burning tears rolling down her cheeks.

Neal stopped dead, staring at her as she started running down the street, away from everything.

Killian woke up with an intense pain in his head which made him moan quietly.  
"You should try to be still," he heard a soft voice somewhere in the room.  
"Emma?" he whispered faintly.  
"No, it's Snow, Emma isn't here for the moment," Snow answered him as she took a step forward so that he could look up at her.  
Killian blinked against the light a few times, "Where is she?"  
Snow didn't answer him at once, and Killian felt how she twisted uncomfortably beside him.  
"She's fine. Emma went back home," Snow replied shortly with a small smile on her face.  
Killian felt how the panic in his chest increased with every breath of air.

It made him quiver in pain. _That means that she isn't fine at all, _he thought. _  
_Killian struggled to get up from the bed as he started to pull away the monitor equipment that was holding him down.  
"I need to find her," he's voice sounded alarmed. _She was running away.  
_Snow tried to hold him down, "You need to stay here Hook, you're hurt," she explained as she looked down compassionately at the pirate.

The nurses put a needle in his arm before he even noticed that they were there. It made him flinch, "What the bloody hell is that?" he cried out before his eyelids went down as the darkness embraced him once again.

After a couple of minutes, Snow closed the door of the sleeping pirate's room. She went to her husband in the waiting room, and David put his strong arms around her.  
"Have they found her yet?" she asked him quietly. She knew not to worry, Emma could take care of herself, but her absence confused her. Snow had known all along that there was something between her daughter and the pirate, from the first moment they had met. The way he'd looked at her then, with both pride and admiration, and how her eyes had sparkled when he had said something to annoy her.

"She wasn't at her apartment, the station or at Granny's," David sighted.  
"David," Snow looked up at her husband, "You need to talk to her, you need to apologize, to both of them," she said. David made a frown and looked down at his wife and met her firm gaze, his lips tightened before he replied "Yeah, I guess you're right."

"I think a know where she is" Snow suddenly lit up, giving her husband a teasing smile.

Emma threw herself on the bed in the Captain's cabin on the Jolly Roger. Even though she'd spent days on the ship, she had never been in there much, feeling like she was intruding. The sheets were dark blue and smelled like _him, _like the ocean, rum and _home_. She let her tears fall down on the pillow, wondering if they would ever stop. She wasn't used to crying, it made her feel helpless and even more lost than usual. Pulling her knees up, she laid in the bed sobbing. Oddly, she felt a little better after a while, and the waves finally rocked her to sleep.

She woke up when she felt someone softly squeezing her shoulder.  
"Emma?" David said in a low tone by her side. He was sitting on the edge of the bed looking down at her. When she sat up and looked around, slightly confused, her eyes captured a broken table that Killian must have been shoved into. She felt her stomach twist.  
"Emma, we need to talk," David tried again. She couldn't see a way out of this one.  
"Yeah, about how you put Killian in the hospital" she snarled, knowing that she was a bit unfair.

"I thought he was hurting you, I'm sorry," David replied.

"Well, he wasn't," Emma said as she tried to push away the fear that had started to consume her again.

David sat quiet for a while, not knowing what he could say to make his daughter feel better. He could see the hopeless look on her face, and he felt her pain. Even after she had slept, she looked worn out with shadows under her empty eyes.

"What can I do, Emma?" he said and put an arm around her shoulder to let her lean against him.

Her previous irritation was gone, and she answered him with sadness in her voice,  
"I don't know, Dad."

"Do you want to go back to the hospital? He asked about you," David said and he could distinguish a small smile on her lips, but it was gone in an instant.

"I don't know if I can," she replied with a desperate tone of voice.

David raised his brows and gazed at his daughter, "Why not?"

Emma closed her eyes briefly. "I'm terrified, I can't do it" she confessed in a whisper, not wanting to say it aloud.

David sighed heavily. He definitely didn't want his only daughter ending up with a pirate. However, thinking back, he knew that true love was not something that one could choose. Only she could find out who her true love was, even if it would pain him that he didn't have the right to choose for her.

"Emma honey, true love isn't easy, but it must be fought for," he said after a while.  
She raised a questioning eyebrow before she quickly replied, "No one said anything about love."

It made David burst out into laughter as he stood up, pulling her with him.  
"Are you sure that you don't want to come with me to the hospital? Henry is there you know"  
he said.

"What is he doing there?" she said, thinking that he was supposed to be with Ruby.

"Well, someone had to make the pirate stay in the hospital bed. Henry was the only one Hook wouldn't dare touch, so we put him in charge of guarding the pirate to ensure he wouldn't storm out," David shrugged. Emma's lips lifted up in an amused smile. That was a sight that she very much would have liked to see.

Emma let her father drive her back to the large hospital building. She tried to keep up appearances when she was greeted by her mother and Henry in the waiting room.

"Hey kiddo," she ruffled his hair lightly.  
"It's really good that you are here!" her son breathed, "Hook just threw Jello at one of the nurses who was trying to clean his wound!"  
"Of course he did," Emma sight and couldn't help to feel slightly annoyed even though the terrifying feeling was nagging in her. "I'm going to see how he is doing, I will meet you back at home kid," she said as she headed toward the captain's room. She hesitated outside the door, she felt like everything was just shoved in her face again. When she carefully pushed the door up she heard his boiling voice.

"You are not coming near me with…" he started but stopped as soon as he laid eyes on the blonde in the doorway.  
"If you don't behave I can always cuff you" she said and tried to smile at him.

"Swan" he breathed and relief shone through his piercing blue eyes.  
She didn't move from her spot by the door. His hair was messy, and she discovered a large cut on the left side of his face. Still, even in a hospital bed, with bandages and bruises, he was ridiculously good-looking.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, still standing by the door, not really daring to walk in.

He flinched, almost looking a little scared, "For what?" he asked.  
Emma looked down, "Everything" she answered.

Killian stayed quiet. He could sense how she was pulling away from him, and he wasn't planning on saying something to scare her off completely. Emma just stood there for what felt like eternity, playing with her hair.

"What's wrong, love?" Killian couldn't stand the silence anymore. He felt like she was miles away, impossible to reach, even though she was standing in front of him. He couldn't believe that it was just a day ago that she had been right in his arms. He knew that it was too good to be true.

Emma continued to look down at the floor. She couldn't walk away, and she didn't dare to move closer. She felt the chills in her body increasing as her pulse started pumping rapidly.

_"Emma, look at me," _Killian's voice was soft as silk.

She glanced at him underneath her eyelashes. His piercing blue eyes captured hers, even though she tried to avoid them. It didn't make her heartbeat slow down, but the cold feeling faded. She carefully moved towards him until she was standing next to the bed, their eyes were still locked.

"Since I promised that I wouldn't leave…" Killian hesitated and swallowed. Emma raised an eyebrow, she could sense that she wasn't the only one that was scared right now.

"Can you promise me that you won't?" Killian tried to keep his voice steady, still looking at her.

Emma stopped breathing. She opened her mouth to answer, but she didn't let out any words. His eyes shifted from fear to pain and then slowly started to turn dark.

"_Killian, I..." _her voice was almost soundless.

He turned his head away and closed his eyes. That little movement mad Emma's body ache.  
She took a deep breath when the door suddenly opened behind her.  
David stepped in and scratched his neck uncomfortably.  
"I just thought that I should apologize," he sounded embarrassed.  
Killian's eyes opened and Emma didn't like his look at all. The light blue spark that she could distinguish when she concentrated was gone, replaced by darkness.

"Don't worry about it mate, I have been through a lot worse," Killian gave him a wide grin.

"Well, I'm sorry. If my daughter wants to be with you, I guess that I will have to get used to it," David apologized.

Pain appeared on Killian's face for a second, before he pulled himself together as he let out a bitter laugh, "I don't think that you have to worry about that, mate."

David looked at him, slightly confused and then he turned his gaze to Emma, whose eyes were pinned to the floor.

"Good" David replied with uncertainty. "Emma, do you need a ride home?" David turned to his daughter.

She looked up at her father and then down to the pirate next to her. Killian had closed his eyes again and she could see how his lower lip was trembling. She shook her head, barely aware of it, and David walked out, the door closing behind him.

Killian opened his eyes again, always aware of her presences. He threw her a questioning look before she pushed him to the side of the bed as she cuddled up beside him and gently put her head on his chest. Emma felt how his heart rate increased and his body felt a bit tense and unsure as she placed a hand around his waist.

"I promise" she whispered, knowing that he needed to hear it.

She turned her head up kissed him gently. She could feel how every last trace of uncertainty disappeared as the taste of saltwater, rum and the sweetest honey embraced her. Killian smiled against her lips, and carefully pulled her in closer, wishing that they could stay like that, always and forever. 


End file.
